Christianity: Having Unsaved Friends
This is not the first time I’ve written on this topic. In fact, one of my favorite articles here on The Rebel Christian is about being unequally yoked—if you haven’t read that post yet, I strongly urge you to take a look at it by clicking here. I also have another article on ungodly relationships I think you should read if you’re wondering about how to handle connections with unbelievers. The Holy Spirit led me back to this topic so I want to take some time to discuss what it can mean and how it can impact you when you are a Christian with unsaved friends.
The first scripture to come to mind is obviously II Corinthians 6:14 NIV:
Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?
Many people immediately associate this scripture with dating and marriage—and that’s a good thing! Christians should not date outside their faith; no matter how nice and respectful your boyfriend/girlfriend is of your faith, if they aren’t taking part in it then they aren’t right for you. But what surprises me most about this scripture is how many people don’t associate it with friendships.
How many of you reading this article can honestly say that you have unsaved friends? It’s alright, there isn’t anything wrong with having an unsaved friend; the problem happens when you become yoked to that unsaved friend.
So, what does it mean to be yoked to someone? According to Google, the term yoke is a device for joining together a pair of draft animals. Obviously, we are not animals, so in the scripture II Corinthians 6:14 NIV, we can conclude that Paul is making a reference to humans being joined together with one another.
Physical intimacy is one way to join someone with another person, but you can also develop strong emotional ties with someone you care about and spend a lot of time with. You can be unequally yoked to a childhood friend as much as a beautiful girlfriend. You can be unequally yoked to your unsaved sibling as much as your unsaved fiancé.
To be unequally yoked with someone doesn’t just mean to be in love with an atheist. It means that you are joined together with someone who is not the same as you.
What’s so important to note about II Corinthians 6:14 is that it simply says unbelievers. It doesn’t say Do not be yoked together with your ex-boyfriend, your atheist neighbor, or your Muslim coworker. The Word says do not be yoked together with unbelievers—this encompasses every sort of unsaved person, friend, family, coworker, and everyone in between.
Let’s look at the rest of this verse. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common?
This is such a beautiful passage. I love the NIV Bible because it includes the stark comparison of righteousness and wickedness. My friend, please don’t forget that when someone is not worshipping Christ, they are worshipping the devil. I know a lot of Christian sources have begun using very gentle, inclusive language, but I’m going to be straight with you… Anyone who is not a Child of God is a child of the devil. Those who are unsaved are in active rebellion against God. While we are the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus, unsaved people are the wickedness of Satan—and you should have nothing to do with them.
I know … I know … some things cannot be helped. You can’t choose your family or your coworkers. But you can choose your friends. If you have unsaved friends, I am not telling you to get rid of them; I am asking you to consider that spending time with them does not bring you closer to Christ.
Now, let’s finish the verse. Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?
Notice the word fellowship here. Fellowship is defined as a friendly association, especially with people who share one’s interests. Isn’t that interesting? Not only is fellowship a friendly association, but it specially describes the friendship of people who share the same interests.
I know this is a very broad concept to some—I’m a Christian and I love video games and Batman comics and making homemade soup. How many people—saved or unsaved—share those same interests? But I’m not talking about what you do with your free time. I’m talking about what you do with your life.
As a Christian you should strive to honor Christ in everything you do. Your goals at work should be to showcase Christianity in your workspace. You should always be looking for ways to support the Body of Christ. You should aim to expand the Kingdom of God. You should love God and hate evil. Love life and hate abortion. Love marriage and hate the corruption that has tainted it. You should love Christian music, books, and movies versus secular entertainment. You should love Bible study, church retreats, and Christian festivals over concerts and nightclubs.
When you break it down this way, who you are as a Christian shouldn’t have anything in common with unsaved people. And if you have nothing in common with unbelievers, then why are you with them? I can name dozens of people in my life who are not Christian—gay people, atheists, Muslims, and more—and I get along with them perfectly fine. But this article isn’t about whether or not you should get along with people who are different from you, you can learn how to do that in preschool. The point I’m trying to drive home isn’t that Christians cannot be around unsaved people. I am not saying you have to hide away from the rest of the world and seclude yourselves or risk total damnation. No, my friend. What I’m saying is that you, as a Christian, should not desire to be connected with people who are unsaved.
Some Christians have fooled themselves into thinking they can hang out with unsaved people or date unbelievers because they may lead them to Christ. As nice, and even as sincere, as this may sound, the reality is not so simple.
Look at I Corinthians 15:33 NIV: Do not be misled: Bad company corrupts good character.
The first part of this scripture is so important—do not be misled. Don’t be fooled, don’t be mistaken, STOP PLAYING! It may sound nice and cozy to say you can lead your unsaved boyfriend to Christ, but the truth is the exact opposite. Bad company corrupts good character.
As much of a chance that you have to lead your unsaved friends and family to Christ, don’t forget they also have an equal chance of dragging you into darkness. Influence works both ways, especially when you aren’t as strong in your faith as you might think you are.
Now, don’t think I’m telling you to go through your phone and block all your unsaved contacts. No, my friend, that’s not what I’m saying at all. What I’m saying is, you may have unsaved friends and family, but unless you are witnessing to them or sharing the Word—why are you with them? What do you get out of hanging out with your unsaved friends? A good time? You can have a good time with God. You can have fun at church. And if you have no church friends or Christian friends, suck it up—you’ll have friends in heaven!
CHRISTIANS WAKE UP. Jesus IS coming soon and we, as the waiting generation, have a job to do. It goes beyond making friends and having a good time. It’s time to lay down our childishness and focus on the bigger picture. Who cares about having friends when you can have the power of God? My friend, you have a job to do. You have a mission assigned by God that only YOU can do. So stop fussing over friends and get to work. Get right and get with God and get the job done. We have a spiritual war to finish.